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HiSS-Graphics
31st Aug 2021, 12:00 AM



:3



Did you know that for $5 a month, you can follow this comic 4 updates ahead in my Patreon? Not only that, but $5 and above get a discount for my online store, and you're helping Marid reach it's goal of updating three times a week! That's a lot of pages!

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Aliencon
31st Aug 2021, 12:04 AM

So Griha's been in romantic relationships before? If so, will we ever learn more about them?

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HiSS-Graphics
31st Aug 2021, 8:23 AM

Perhaps, perhaps.

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fire238
31st Aug 2021, 4:11 PM

Okay, that actually gets me on Sandra's side a bit.
What kind of break up is a sudden "I don't like the way I feel anymore?"
I mean, I understand having a tough time parsing emotions, but RJ really did her a bit dirty just leaving her hanging.

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HiSS-Graphics
31st Aug 2021, 4:37 PM

Yeah... There were problems on both sides, trust me. Neither of them are innocent in the break up.

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fire238
1st Sep 2021, 12:16 AM

Maybe if they could just agree that it didn't work out, they were both culpable (specifics aren't important), and they need to move on, they could be happier people.

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HiSS-Graphics
1st Sep 2021, 9:25 AM

Actually their main problem isn't that they both think they're innocent. Their problem is that they both see the post break up differently.

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fire238
1st Sep 2021, 9:56 AM

It's alarming how much trouble a difference of perspective can cause.

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HiSS-Graphics
1st Sep 2021, 10:02 AM

It is. Most of the arguments between my spouse and I are due to misunderstandings.

Would you like to hear what the different perspectives are with Sandra and RJ?

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fire238
1st Sep 2021, 2:08 PM

Yes, please!

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HiSS-Graphics
1st Sep 2021, 2:29 PM

RJ sees the post break up as Sandra wants him back and wants them to date again. But when you think about: Sandra has never said "I want to get back together." or anything of the sort. The reader is just under the impression that Sandra wants RJ back, because the only one who has voiced their perspective is RJ.

Sandra simply can't move past the post break up due to the lack of closure. She is riddled with questions which she wants answers to, but the only person who can answer them is RJ, leaving her constantly running in circles and obsessing over them. It doesn't help that RJ was her rock, always there for her, caring for her. This was before they were even dating.

So him suddenly leaving her with questions, and pulling away instead of caring about her well being are all clashing in her head and she can't make sense of it. Then RJ gives an olive branch and reaches out because he is deep down still worried about her, she is happy because he shows that he cares, she sees this as a chance to get answers, her obsession shows, which RJ sees as her wanting to get back together, and he pulls away, creating more questions. Repeat pattern.

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fire238
1st Sep 2021, 4:33 PM

I SEE.
So the root cause is RJ going through whatever issues he's going through right now and being unable to voice/handle them in a healthy manner, which causes Sandra to be put into an awkward, uncertain position where she has no closure and thusly pursues RJ looking for answers, which he misinterprets as a desire to get back together, causing him to distance himself.
Do I have that right?

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HiSS-Graphics
1st Sep 2021, 5:17 PM

Yup. Well summarized!

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Ebonbolt
2nd Sep 2021, 5:07 PM

Not attempting to absolve RJ here, but it can be hard to express, define, or explain emotions, especially complex emotions or emotions one has little experience with. Combine more than one of these factors, you get more difficulty; go for the hat trick, ...
And RJ is young, doesn't seem the type to have a lot of broken hearts in his history, so I'm guessing (just guessing) he doesn't have much experience with breakups either. No, his methods aren't healthy for Sandra (and thus, not for him either), but some people deal best with stress by distancing ourselves from it until we can get a perspective on it, then bring it back in to handle it. RJ just has to deal with Sandra's coping methods clashing with his own (thus the need for mediation; enter Griha).

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HiSS-Graphics
2nd Sep 2021, 7:15 PM

@Ebonbolt
*insert proud and respectful nod from the author* Well done. That was a fantastic diagnosis!

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